So this morning I stumbled on that horoscope headline while scarfing down toast – you know, the one about planets messing with your day. Made me chuckle ’cause my car stalled twice yesterday for no reason. Figured why not try this horoscope thing myself? Grabbed whatever junk was lying around to stand in for planets.
Setting Up My Garbage Planet Lab
Cleared the kitchen table first. No fancy crystals or star charts here – just whatever crap I could find. Dug out marbles from my kid’s forgotten toy box for Mercury, grabbed a rusty ball bearing from the toolbox thinking Saturn vibes, crumpled tinfoil for the Moon… you get the idea. Even poured salt shaker “stars” that immediately spilled everywhere. Typical.
Playing Celestial Matcher
Started squinting at my phone’s horoscope site while pushing junk around the table:
- Dragged that rusty Saturn bearing close to my coffee mug “Earth” when it said “restrictions”
- Shoved Venus (a pink eraser) toward the sugar jar for “sweet opportunities”
- Flicked Mars (angry red Lego) away from my car keys super fast
Honestly felt like a kid playing with mud pies. Noticed the ball bearing kept rolling toward my overdue bills pile – either Saturn’s a real jerk or my table’s crooked. Leaning toward crooked.
What Actually Happened?
Saturn ball near bills? Couldn’t pay ’em regardless. Moon tinfoil ball “emotions” meant nothing when the neighbor’s dog barked all afternoon. Only “win”? Found five bucks near where I put the Venus eraser later when taking trash out. Coincidence? Probably. Still bought a stale donut with it.
Worth it? Eh. It’s fun pretending marbles control fate. Maybe tomorrow I’ll use cat toys instead. Shrug.