My Horoscope Prep Journey Begins
So last month, my pal Dave randomly texts me saying, “Yo, you’re an Aries right? June’s gonna shake things up big time for you.” Honestly? I’ve never been big into horoscopes but something about his tone made me pause. Thought screw it, let’s put this to the test myself. Pulled up this June 2024 Aries forecast everyone’s buzzing about.
First Step: Hunting Down Key Dates
Grabbed my ancient paper calendar – yeah, the dinosaur kind with coffee stains. Needed to scribble in the cosmic deadlines. Flipped pages like a madman hunting for specific dates:
- June 4: Wrote “VENUS OPPOSITE JUPITER? New $ opportunity?” in shaky red pen.
- June 17: Circled it twice yelling at my cat. “HEY NEBULA! That Full Moon peak! Major career climax!”
- June 28: Drew fat question marks. “WTH is Mercury square Mars? Communication landmine??”
Cat looked super unimpressed. Smudged ink everywhere trying to decode planetary gibberish.
Actually Living Through The Advice
Started June 1 thinking this would be smooth sailing. Wrong. That June 4 Venus-Jupiter thing? Hustled my ass networking like forecast said. Result? Got ghosted by three LinkedIn contacts and the coffee shop WiFi died mid-pitch. Total dumpster fire.
Then came June 17 Full Moon fever. Forecast screamed “show leadership.” So I volunteered to run the neighborhood BBQ planning committee. Complete disaster. Forgot to buy charcoal, burgers went airborne, Mr. Henderson flipped out about pickle proximity. “Career peak” my foot. But somehow… people remembered I took charge?
And Mercury square Mars June 28? Oh yeah. Tipped off by the stars, I avoided replying to Karen’s passive-aggressive email that morning. Just deleted her rant about font choices. Best decision ever. Saw later she roasted Dave over comma usage.
What Actually Stuck
- Major Surprise: That June 20 solar eclipse warning to pause before signing contracts? Dodged a crappy freelance deal that “felt off.” Client ghosted after I hesitated.
- Kinda Blew It: Mars in Taurus advice to “build foundations” meant restarting savings. Instead bought fancy weights collecting dust.
- Weird Win: Neptune retrograde said “avoid alcohol decisions.” Skipped drinks Tuesday. Next day? Boss randomly assigned a huge project. Coincidence? Maybe not.
Honestly? Mix of vague hits and hilarious misses. But tracking those dates did something weird – kept me noticing patterns I’d usually sleepwalk past. Like cosmic speed bumps reminding me to look up.
Was This Worth The Chaos?
Splitting headache trying to match star positions with spreadsheet deadlines? Absolutely. My calendar now looks like a rainbow clown puked on it. BUT – having those planetary cheat-sheet days made me pivot faster than usual. Didn’t magically manifest lottery cash or solve my neighbor’s yappy dog crisis. Still felt kinda… focused? Like tuning into cosmic background static.
Would I do it again? Yeah probably. But only with extra coffee. And maybe better charcoal.
