Honestly folks, this whole astrology thing always sounded like total BS to me. But my followers kept bugging me, “What about our love lives in 2024?!” So I figured, screw it, let’s test-drive this Aries 2024 love horoscope everyone’s yapping about.
Getting Down to Business
First step? Found the loudest “BEST MATCHES FOR TRUE LOVE ARIES 2024!” article I could Google. Printed the damn thing out – easier to scribble notes.
- Step one: Highlight the so-called “best matches”. Leo, Sagittarius, Gemini. Libra popped up too. Noted with a big yellow marker.
- Step two: Check the dates. Needed real people born under these signs, obviously. My dating apps? Perfect guinea pigs.
- Step three: Profile overhaul. Adjusted my profile headline to something cheesy like “Aries Fire 🔥 Seeking Adventure Partner 2024”. Felt ridiculous.
The Messy Experiment Phase
Started swiping like a madman specifically on Leos, Sags, Gems, and Libras. Gotta follow the prophecy, right? Ignored everyone else – Taurus? Sorry pal, horoscope says no.
Matched with a Leo woman first – bold profile, tons of travel pics. Messaged her: “Horoscope says we’re cosmic besties for 2024, thoughts?”. Actual response: “LOL is that how you open all your chats?” Oof. One point against astrology. Tried again with a Sag guy: “Sag energy popping! Aries & Sag = unstoppable 2024?”. His reply? “Huh? Just asking if you hike.” Strike two.
The Gemini? Quick chat turned into three dates. Fast talker, super witty – felt the “intellectual spark” the article promised. BUT then he double-booked Saturday night without blinking. Classic Gem chaos. Guess the “best match” forgot to mention the mind games.
Wrapping Up This Cosmic Disaster
After a month forcing dates based on starsigns:
- Leo girl ghosted after my awkward opener.
- Sag guy just wanted trail buddies.
- Gemini was fun until he got flaky.
- Libra matches? Zero replies. Zilch.
Verdict? Maybe Leos, Sags, and Gems are exciting matches. Or maybe it’s just random luck meeting cool people. Trying to filter reality through star dust? Yeah, nah. Back to swiping on whoever makes me laugh next time.
Save yourself the headache. Forget the horoscope chart. Just grab a coffee with someone interesting and see what happens. Stars optional.
